BANE

Part 12
By Jo


Somehow Luka made it back from the park; it took all his concentration to climb the few steps into the apartment lobby without falling. He cursed himself for "losing" his cane; he could have used it today for sure. He had forced himself to keep going until he got to his kitchen, knowing if he stopped at the couch to rest he'd fall asleep. Now he sat at the kitchen table waiting for the microwave to finish cooking his dinner, thinking of Radic and Mecheal and Karel and Stephan, their images spinning and dancing in his mind, morphing together, their voices mixing, echoing through his brain. There was just so much, so much, Luka thought- Radic's veiled threats, Mecheal's bitterness, Karel's mocking, Stephan waving good-bye...

Poor Stephan- Luka's mind lingered on the boy, so innocent- yet caught in the middle of everything, danger swirling around him. Certainly Mecheal loved her boy, but surely she could see that he was Karel's son, surely she could see Karel's face, Karel's eyes, Karel's smile, reflected on her child. Or maybe she didn't, Luka thought. Maybe she had to deny the truth in order to keep going, in order to keep loving her son- she had to tell herself that Stephan was Ljutomisl's son, that she and her husband had had a miracle child- to admit that Stephan was a child of rape would be too horrible. Luka rubbed his forehead, then his hand went to his side- how hard it must be for her; now he knew why Mecheal had built a fortress around herself, why she could make herself so hard- it was the only way to protect herself from the truth. No wonder she was so bitter.

But that bitterness was a poison, Luka realized. What had she wanted him to do to Radic? Kill him right there in the park, in front of all the children, in front of her child? Luka had meant it when he had told Mecheal he could never harm Radic- Luka had seen enough killing, enough death, enough blood. It was time for it to stop; Luka had to put a stop to it. For some reason he believed that Radic would leave him alone; as long as Luka said nothing, did nothing to jeopardize Radic's lifestyle he would be safe. Luka felt it was time to let go, time to try to get on with his life, time to try and live in peace, time to forget the past. He would never forget his family, of course- they would always live in his heart, always be with him- but it was time to forget the hate, time to forget the horror. He built his boxes stronger, sealed the lids tighter, and pushed Karel and Radic farther away, trying to bury them deeper in his unconsciousness, hoping the memories would leave him alone.

But that night Luka's dreams where filled with Mecheal and Stephan, with Karel and Stephan-with Karel laughing about his son, laughing at Mecheal, laughing at Luka.

"You can never escape me," Karel sneered. "Mecheal's hatred of me will poison Stephan, will help him turn out just like me! He'll grow up to make his dad proud!" Then Karel laughed, the sound echoing and echoing through Luka's head, ruining his sleep, ruining his peace. Luka lay awake in the dark, staring at the ceiling, thinking of Stephan, innocent, endangered- knowing there was nothing he could do to help the boy.

Somehow Luka had managed to fall back to sleep; now the sun was up, trying to make it's way through the blinds. Luka made his way haltingly to the shower; wondering when he'd ever be able to walk without thinking, without pain. One day, Luka reminded himself, this will be just another bad memory, just another box stored unopened, forgotten; all his time in Chicago would be a bad dream he could chase away with the coming of the dawn... The phone rang as Luka got dressed, but he didn't bother to answer it. He wasn't sure if he wanted to talk to anyone this morning; it was time to start shutting people out again, time to start getting ready to move on, and the fewer ties, the less contact he had with anyone, the better. But Mecheal's voice sounded from the answering machine with its now-familiar hard edge.

"Luka, I found where Radic is staying in Chicago." The words made Luka freeze a moment, then he quickly grabbed the phone- he didn't trust Mecheal, was afraid of what she might do...

"Mecheal," he said anxiously, "what are you..."

"Shut up," Mecheal snapped angrily. "You can't get the job done, so I have to take care of things. I'm doing you a favor by letting you know what I'm doing. I suggest you stay far away from the Ritz Carlton. Maybe even find someone to be with so you can have an alibi- we don't want poor Janko to be accused of something he wouldn't dare do." Mecheal's voice dripped sarcasm; she sounded uncomfortably like Karel, like the man she hated most; Luka felt like he would be sick.

"Mecheal, " he pleaded, "Listen to me- please, just listen!" She said nothing, but he could tell she was still there- maybe he had a chance to talk her out of doing anything.

"Mecheal," he went on, "Think about what you're doing. I know how it feels to kill someone, how it can destroy you, destroy your life. The guilt follows you forever. I know; I lived with it for five years, will always live with it..."

"But the man you killed was innocent," Mecheal reminded him cruelly. "Radic is guilty- GUILTY!"

"I thought- no, I *knew* the man I killed was guilty, too, " Luka said softly, the pain coming again. "Until Karel told me otherwise. It just doesn't matter- the shame follows you everywhere, it eats at you, it tortures you..."

"Ha!" Mecheal scoffed, "Maybe it eats at you because your God tells you what you did was wrong. But Karel deserved to die, and so does Radic. I won't feel any guilt about killing someone who deserves to die."

"But what about Stephan?" Luka insisted, his head spinning. "What will happen to your boy, Ljutomisl's boy?"

"His boy?" She answered with disdain, "You mean Karel's boy." So she did know, Luka thought. "He'd be better off with out me. My whole life is a lie, just like yours, Janko. We can't hide from who we are, from what we are, from what they did to us, Janko. I can't sit back and let that dog live, after all he's done. It doesn't matter what happens to me, as long as Radic dies. And Stephan- he'd be better off with someone who doesn't know his past, doesn't know his father. It would be better for him." Mecheal was crying, Luka could hear her tears through her anger, through her hate. He felt so helpless; if only she were here, he thought, maybe I could help her, maybe talk some sense into her. Or at least lock her away until Radic was safely out of Chicago.

"Mecheal, come see me, please," Luka begged. "I can help you. You don't need to do this. Please come here first, okay? Please." But she just laughed at him.

"No, Luka- you can't stop me. I'm going there. That's all." Luka tried to say more, but the phone had gone dead, Mecheal had hung up. Desperately he dialed her number, but she didn't answer; Luka was afraid that that she was already at the hotel, already on the elevator heading to Radic's room. He found the phone book and called the Ritz Carlton; the desk clerk put him right through to Radic's room.

"Gregor." Luka was relieved to hear his enemy's voice. "It's Luka, Luka Kovac."

"Dr. Kovac, " Radic said warily. "What do you want? And it better be good."

"There's a woman on her way to see you, Radic..."

"You're little girlfriend? I know- she called before. What does she want, Dr. Kovac?" Radic asked suspiciously.

"She thinks she knows you from Croatia," Luka told him. He knew he had to be careful; he didn't want to endanger Mecheal, but he had to warn Radic; Luka's head started pounding again. "I think you're in danger, Radic."

"I'm not afraid of any mere woman, Dr. Kovac" Radic said smugly. "Besides, I have nothing to hide, nothing to worry about."

"I don't trust her," Luka went on urgently. "She's not- not thinking clearly. If you tell me your room number, I'll come over and get her- then we can forget this whole thing." Radic was silent for a minute.

"You know, Dr. Kovac, this is all very strange. Perhaps I should see you both. Come up to room 1214, and we'll talk. Just be aware that my-'associates' will know about this little meeting, too. So don't even think of trying anything stupid." Radic sounded dangerous, like a cobra ready to strike.

"Okay, I'll be right over," Luka promised. "Just be careful with her."

"Don't worry about me, Luka. I can take care of myself," Radic answered.

Luka hurriedly called for a cab; he didn't trust himself to drive yet, and he wasn't quite sure how to get to the Ritz Carlton. He toyed with the idea of calling the police; Mecheal was a danger, he knew. But he also knew that if the police arrested her, his whole story would come out, his whole past would be revealed. Hopefully she wouldn't be able to go through with it; it's one thing to plan a murder, another to actually face the person and kill him.

Luka made it to the hotel within fifteen minutes hoping that he'd gotten there before Mecheal. He knocked his fist against the wall of the elevator; nervously waiting for the twelfth floor, glad there was no one else in the car- they would have thought he was crazy. Thankfully room 1214 wasn't very far down the hall; Luka's leg and side were throbbing again, the stress, physical and mental, was wearing on him. He pounded on Radic's door, afraid of what he might find; but Gregor opened it casually.

"Welcome, Dr. Kovac, I've been expecting you," Radic said smoothly. Luka scanned the room, looking for Radic's 'associates', but the only other person there was Mecheal; she greeted him with an angry glare from the far side of the room. Luka walked slowly towards her, jumping a bit when Radic closed the door.

"This young lady has been telling me quite a story, Dr. Kovac, " Radic said steadily, "She's been accusing me of quite a lot." His eyes narrowed as Luka looked at him. "Perhaps you know her tale?" Luka shivered despite the warm breeze blowing in from the balcony; he felt sick, he wished he could be anywhere but here.

"She made me aware of it yesterday," Luka answered quietly. He was inching closer to Mecheal; she didn't seem to notice; her eyes followed Radic as he walked over to the bar, her features were frozen by the anger she felt, the hate glinted in her eyes. "I wasn't sure what to make of what she told me." Luka added weakly.

"Well, it certainly sounds like something our dear Karel might do," Radic said easily, "But you know, Luka, that I was nothing more than an arms dealer. I- stayed away from things like that. Too- messy, too complicated." Radic turned his back to fix himself a vodka and orange juice.

"You bastard!" Mecheal hissed. "You were there! You know it!" Luka was trying to get near her, but a couch blocked him, he carefully made his way around it; he could feel the tension emanating from Mecheal.

"Now, now, Miss Mecheal," Radic said condescendingly, and then everything started happening too quickly. Luka say something shiny in Mecheal's hand; he lunged forward awkwardly and managed to grab her wrist, sending a gun skittering across the floor. Despite her small size, Mecheal was strong; her fury, her determination to kill Radic, made her stronger still. She was cursing Luka, hitting him with her free hand, trying to pull away. Luka tried to hold on against her twisting, tried to grab her with his other hand, but he was still so weak; his leg buckled and the two stumbled forward onto the balcony. Suddenly one of Mecheal's blows found the still- healing wound on his side; Luka was blinding by a searing white pain. He could feel Mecheal pull away as he dropped to his knees gasping for breath; he had let go so fast she hadn't expected it, she was falling away from him, he dimly heard her cry out through the haze of pain. He tried to focus his eyes, and he realized that she had gone over the rail, that she was falling, falling, and there was nothing he could do to save her. Luka collapsed on the balcony, not daring to think about it, the pain from his side shooting through his body, wishing he were dead...

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