Champagne and Chocolate
Epilogue
By Gin
Lying in bed looking at the ceiling, Luka knew he wasn’t going to sleep. There were too many things running through his mind. He might as well as get up. Gently removing the arm that had found its way across his chest, Luka moved quietly; he didn’t want to wake the woman sleeping by his side. Wrapping his robe about him, he looked lovingly at her sleeping face before turning and leaving the bedroom.
He stopped in the living room illuminated
only by the soft lights that glowed from a Christmas tree in one
corner and a dying fire. After stirring up the embers
and adding another log, Luka soon had the flames crackling once
again in the fireplace, adding their light to the room with
interesting shadows that danced across the walls.
Taking a deep breath he enjoyed the scent of cinnamon and
evergreen that filled the room from the tree. He
glanced at the presents piled underneath waiting to be opened in
the morning. He smiled as he thought of his lady.
That afternoon he had caught her poking around the gaily-wrapped
packages, shaking some of them, trying to guess what they
contained. He had picked her up, threatening to take
her out and dump her in the snow if she wasn’t a good girl!
His smile widened as he pictured her response – wrapping her
arms around his neck, covering his face with kisses, and her
teasing remarks about always “being good.” That
had led to a very pleasant afternoon cuddled in front of the
fireplace.
Leaving the warmth of the fire, Luka
strolled over towards the window. Pulling back the
drapes, he looked out into the cold Colorado night. The
moon had risen over the mountains and the freshly fallen snow
sparkled like thousands of tiny diamonds. Snow
covered the branches of the pines that surrounded their cabin
home like frosting on a cake. But what Luka enjoyed
most was the solitude and the peacefulness of the scene.
The only noise was the crackling of the fireplace and soft
rumbling purrs of Caitlin’s cat sleeping on the sofa.
The words of his favorite Chrismas carol came to mind: “Silent
Night, Holy Night. All is calm, all is bright.”
Yes, Luka, thought, this was a holy night, and in what he
felt was a miracle, his life had become calm and bright.
As he continued to stand by the window lost in thoughts, he
spotted a small band of white-tailed deer emerging from the pine
trees. As he looked on they made their way to
the corn, apples, birdseed, hay and other food Caitlin had
insisted they put out. “After all,” she had told
Luka, “Its Christmas for the animals too. They
deserve a treat.” And of course he had obliged
her, as if he could refuse her anything, he thought with a smile.
Lost in memories, Luka thought how far away
Chicago and County seemed to him now. Almost as if that had
been another lifetime. But it had not always
been so. Like a moving picture through his
mind, he played back the events in his life that had finally led
him here. He saw himself once again boarding that
plane in San Diego after leaving Caitlin standing in her doorway.
After he had lost control and whispered those three little words
to her, he had run like a scared rabbit. He had even
managed to convince himself it had been best for Caitlin that he
had left.
He had returned to Chicago and it had
finally taken hitting rock bottom before he realized how
desperately he had needed help. He had tried to
forget Caitlin by dating Abby, but their first date had been a
total disaster. They had been mugged and he had lost
control killing their mugger. After that he had
tried to shut himself away from the world even more. He
had a drifted into a brief affair with Abby that had mercifully
ended one night while they were having sex; he couldn’t
think of it as making love, as there had been no love involved,
at least not on his part, he had whispered Caitlin’s
name. She had never really been far from his
mind. He had eagerly watched the mail for the
funny little cards she would occasionally send him. Then
when those cards had seemed to stop, his depression had deepened
and he found himself standing at the edge of Lake Michigan one
dark night. He envisioned walking out into the water
and disappearing beneath its dark surface. He
imagined the staff at County wondering about what had happened to
the “crazy foreigner” and then soon forgetting.
But as he took that first step Caitlin’s smiling, laughing
face appeared in his mind. He saw her once again
throw back her head with that look of pure ecstasy on her face as
she bit into a piece of chocolate; that same look that had been
there for him the first time they made love, and a small spark
flared inside him choosing life.
He then found himself taking a different
path, one that led to Dr. Kim Legaspi’s door. She
had helped him come to grips with the posttraumatic stress he
suffered from, the depression, until he was finally able to
banish some of the demons that had haunted him for so long.
He had come to realize that he had been passively committing
suicide all these years; he had not been living but only going
through the motions. Now when he opened that part of
his heart where he kept Elena, Jasna and Marko locked away, he
could do so with the warmth of the happy memories. But
a major breakthrough was the fact that she made him realize his
excuse for leaving Caitlin was another lie he was living.
He had told himself he couldn’t protect her, that’s why
he couldn’t allow himself to get too close, but it wasn’t
her he was protecting – it was himself and his own fears of
loss.
He had taken a leave from County, purchased
a plane ticket and with some fear and uncertainty not knowing
what his reception would be, he headed for San Diego.
The pictures of that meeting played out in Luka’s mind as he
continued to stare out the window, the Colorado night giving way
to the warmth and sunshine of a San Diego day. The
taxi had dropped him off in front of her house.
As he slowly made his way up the walk she opened the door. “Luka?”
Caitlin had questioned, bewilderment in her voice. “What
are you doing here? Is everything okay?” All
he could manage to choke out, because of the emotions
overwhelming him at the sight of her, was a strangled “Caitlin.”
She had wrapped an arm around his waist and led him inside.
Once there he had poured out everything that he had locked away,
what had happened in Chicago since he had left her, and finally
how much he loved and needed her, and wanted to be with her
forever. “After the way I’ve treated you, if you
send me away, I’ll understand.” He had hoarsely
whispered. Then the miracle had happened.
Caitlin had wrapped her love and warmth around him like a blanket
and the healing process that had begun in Chicago was now
complete.
They stayed together for weeks, laughing,
talking, making love, and making plans. They both
determined a fresh start was in order and as luck would have it
they had found these positions open in the hospital in Aspen,
Colorado. They both had applied and been eagerly
accepted. Luka was now Chief of Emergency Services
and Caitlin the new Chief of Trauma Surgery. Caitlin
had been by his side when he returned to Chicago to hand in his
resignation. He had been surprised to see how many
friends he had made there, as many of the nurses and other
doctors surrounded them, wishing them well, telling him they
would miss him. One two people had been missing,
Carter and Abby. Luka felt a pang of regret for Abby,
she hadn’t deserved to be used the way he had used her, but
that too was now part of the past, and he only hoped she would
find the happiness he had found with Caitlin. After
settling into their new community, soon found it was nothing like
the fast pace of either Chicago or San Diego, but they enjoyed
that. It allowed them more time for each other.
They had also found this home they both loved, its rustic log
cabin style, its beautiful glass picture windows allowing them a
spectacular view of the majestic Rockies that surrounded their
new home.
Luka was so deep in thought he hadn’t
heard her approach. Suddenly he felt two slender arms wrap
around his waist and a soft warm body press up close against his
back. “Are you okay, honey?” Caitlin
softly inquired. Turning slightly, Luka gently pulled
his wife around in front of him, wrapping them both inside his
robe, wanting her even closer to him. “Yes, my
love,” he replied in a whisper, “I guess I was just too
happy to sleep. I was just watching the deer.”
He pointed the small herd out to the delight of Cait as she
watched the animals feast on the meal they had left them.
He rested his chin on the top of her head, breathing in deeply
the scent of lavendar that always surrounded her. It
was as much a part of Cait as her skin. “A penny
for your thoughts?” She quietly questioned.
“I was just thinking what a fool I was to have ever left
you, regretting the wasted time spent apart.” Luka
confessed. “We’re together now, and always
will be, thats all that matters. Whats in the past is
over and done with.” Caitlin reassured her husband.
“I know,” he answered, “But I still can’t
believe I walked out on you, and why did you let me go?”
He asked half jokingly, but yet needing to hear her answer.
“I had to let you go. I had no
other choice.” Caitlin replied. “It was the
hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. If I
had tricked you, or forced you into staying whatever feelings you
were developing for me would have turned to anger, resentment,
and maybe even hatred. You would still have left, but
then it would have been for good. This way you left, but
you left me with the hope that perhaps someday you would find
your way back to me.” She didn’t tell
him, and she never would, of the days after he had walked out of
her life where her world had turned to ashes. The
sleepless nights spent crying alone with her cat, barely able to
leave her bed, much less function in any useful way. Until
finally her inner strength had reemerged, forcing her to get on
with her life. As the weeks turned into months, and
the months into two long years, her hope had started to fade.
She found herself spending more and more time at work until that
had become her entire focus in life until that day he had
reappeared on her door.
“How did you ever get to be such a wise
woman?” Luka pondered. “Not wise, my
darling, just a woman in love.” Was her quiet reply.
He tightened his arms around her, drawing her back even closer to
him as he whispered his reply, “And I’m only a poor man
in love with you.” He allowed his hands to
rest gently on the slight swell of her stomach. That
afternoon Cait had gifted him with the best Christmas present he
could ever receive. She had shyly told him that come late
summer, he would once again be a father. He felt his
eyes fill once more with the tears of joy. As they
both stood by the window, suddenly a heavy branch snapped,
dropping its load of snow on the ground. With a
flick of their tails, a few leaps and bounds, the deer
disappeared once more into the forest. “How
beautiful they were!” Caitlin marveled.
Turning in her husband’s arms, she looked up into his face.
“I’m so happy to have been able to share that with you.”
She said, reaching up and pulling his head down so she could
capture his lips. Kissing deeply, their bodies
pressed together, she could feel his arousal. Pulling
back slightly so she could look into his passion-darkened eyes,
with a hint of mischief in her voice Cait inquired, “Know
what I’m in the mood for right now?” Luka
nodded as he attempted to pull her back to him. He
knew what he wanted, and a look of surprised crossed his face at
her next words, “A nice mug of hot chocolate!”
Caitlin giggled as she saw his look. She knew that wasn’t
what he was expecting to hear. Looking down into the
face he adored, Luka chuckled, he should know by now to expect
the unexpected from his love. “Good idea. Why
don’t you go back to bed, I’ll fix it and bring
it to you.” He gently pushed her in the
direction of the bedroom. “Oooh, sounds wonderful!”
She purred, allowing her hand to reach down and casually brush
him, telling him without words of her desire, before she strolled
towards the bedroom. Luka stood motionless
watching her as she stopped in the doorway, and with a
flirtatious glance over her shoulder at her husband, slipped off
her robe letting it fall to the foor. “Don’t
forget the marshmallows!” were her last words before
disappearing into the bedroom, leaving Luka hurrying towards the
kitchen. It was only a matter of minutes before
he too stood in the doorway, two steamy mugs of hot chocolate,
with marshallows, in hand. Using his foot, he kicked
the door shut behind him closing out the rest of the world.
He stood by the bed watching that look come over his wife’s
face as she sipped the cocoa. “This is so good.”
Caitlin groaned. “Luka, you’re spoiling me.”
“I intend to spend the rest of my life
doing just that, my sweet.” He smiled at the picture
she made, her hair spread over her shoulders, the slight
chocolate mustache on her upper lip. Taking a sip
from his own mug Luka walked around to his side of the bed.
As Caitlin threw back the blankets he slid in beside her, their
naked bodies pressing together, hip to hip, thigh to thigh, but
it still wasn’t close enough. He set his
mug on the night stand, and watched as Cait took another sip from
her’s before setting it down and turning to her husband,
opening her arms to him. And soon they were lost once
again in each other and their chocolate-flavored love.
The End